awake minds make for tired fingers.

In the midst of this flash of weeks and glimpses of days that has become my life, I have drifted back into my insomniac ways. This is both good and bad, but I have yet to decide which overrules the other. It is good in the sense that I get shit done. Shit I never even knew I had to do. I have those moments at 2am where I suddenly recall where I've put something or a homework assignment that needs attention. It is good in the sense that I haven't had less laundry to do since I moved into my own place. It is good in the sense that my dog may also be suffering from bouts of a sleep disorder. I'd normally complain, but it's nice to have the company. It is bad in the sense that the rest of the world requires normal sleeping hours and therefore any interaction that I deem necessary with the outside world at this time must be put on hold. It is also bad because my own bad rest habits have severely confused my puppy about what time zone we reside in. However, these things are neither here nor there. This blog isn't exactly about my being an insomniac nor what I do in those wee hours of the morning, but more about the thoughts that enter my less than drowsy mind at this time. I have begun to greatly question my character. Who am I? Who was I? How do I appear? Most of all, supposing that 'good' does have a definition, am I a good person? I'd like to think I am, but perhaps different people would pose different arguments on this specific topic. Here's my own thoughts:

1. I have an unmistakeably-can't live without-great influence-loving-caring-take you in on a rainy night sort of family. I would argue tooth and nail with anyone about the absolute greatness of the people who raised me and those I was raised among. I have been given great opportunities, financial and physical. I was raised with a strong sense of self, taught to go out and face the world. I love my parents for the confidence they have given me. I was encouraged my entire life to leave home after high school, get an education and a job I loved (my mom always says 'you have to work a long time so pick something that makes you happy'), and make a life for myself. I was raised to develop ambition, a good mind, and a strong independent nature.
2. Under my awful procrastination, I am a hard worker. I recently had my palm read and this was one of the most prominent things I was told. Me? Hard working? I'd never really dared define myself this way because of the recurring, less-than-great habits that often cover this up. Yet when opportunities to work hard in life involved something I genuinely care about, am interested in, or love, I'm willing to spend hours and ounces of sanity to get things done.
3. Giving sound advice is in my nature. The small amount of friends I do have (not for lack of trying but more by choice) are typically my friends due to my ability to communicate with them. I love to discuss issues and try to find fitting solutions. I try and often succeed to look at things from multiple angles and perspectives, take a non-judgmental approach, and find an intelligent way to attack. I don't sugar coat things. I'm honest yet helpful. I hope the people I have come to encounter this with appreciate that.
4. I'm in love with a detective. Deal with it. From the second I brought him home, I knew his curiosity would win me over. The way he explored the same things each day like it was a whole new adventure has given me a new love for living. Watson had my heart from the second I picked him up out of a Rubbermaid tub in Provo. He's protective and loving. He keeps my feet on the ground (though it's usually because he wants to bite or lick them). He takes care of my heart and soul, something I'm so thankful for.
5. Patience has never been my strongest suite, but tolerance for others might be. I feel like there are numerous idiots in the world (sorry Lindsay Lohan, Sarah Palin, and anyone on Jersey Shore). Though my road rage and overreactions to the stupid ways some people approach an issue don't necessarily support this statement, I feel that I was raised to believe that no thing is better than the other. We aren't lesser or greater, but rather different. I try extremely hard to tolerate those who I don't particularly agree with and though I don't succeed always, I think I try much harder than most would. I guess if you don't agree with this, I can try to make room for some tolerance for you too.

I guess there is a lot more that could be said, but this is all that comes to mind at 12:39AM. I'm a overall at least okay person with a vibrant soul and a clear mind. I treat other with the respect they have shown themselves worthy of and I only influence people in a way that is going to be beneficial to them. I don't manipulate. I don't lie. I don't tell others what to do. I'm honest. I'm trustworthy. I'm kind to those who stay long enough to see it. I'm caring to everyone to the point that I sometimes exclude myself. I know that there are some people in or now out of my life that haven't taken the opportunity to see this and for that I am sorry. I'm not sorry for a lack of trying on my behalf, but rather sorry to them that they don't care to break down my rough exterior to witness the person I know I am.

xoxo.
morgan.

musings of a bookworm.

I'm a reader. Call it a curse. Call it a hobby. Whatever you do, don't call me. I'm reading. I'm currently in between a mess of books, mostly of different genres and mostly entirely different from one another. I pride my life on variety I suppose. I will usually unmark the book the most brightens my day during a particular hour or mood. As of lately, Chelsea Handler has done the job most appropriately....and I quote:

"I learned early on about redheads and how they were prone to melanoma. I wasn't about to invest in my first Cabbage Patch doll, only to lose her years later to cancer. Plus, I had a young childhood friend named Farrah Linklater, and her whole family had red hair. It was thick, unruly red hair that would inevitably end up in one of the dishes they served at dinner. I was sure of this. They were like a tribe, an Indian tribe who took up weapons against other single-hair-colored families. Red hair was always suspicious to me, like something made out of flammable synthetic fibers. Redheads are a minority and the more consolidated they become, the greater the danger. The only thing I could imagine more suspicious than a regular redhead was a black redhead, but I knew that whatever company was in charge of Cabbage Patch dolls was not nearly progressive enough to throw that at the marketplace."
-Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang

Happy reading to all.
xoxo.
Morgan

The Faces of Freddy Spaghetti

Frederick may be the most animated person I know. Here's a few faces from the last month or so :]

influence & arrogance.

I don't have children so it maybe a little out of line for me to post something like this. However, it's my blog and here in this little corner of cyberspace, I say what I choose. You typed in the URL so you can deal with it. The more media I encounter, the more I am forced to wonder: what the hell is going on in today's world of stars, professional athletes, and "role models"? I remember being about eight years old and thinking Michael Jordan was a stand up guy/basketball player, Whitney Houston was truly talented, and our political leaders were doing the best they can. The way this scene has evolved truly scares me for several reasons. I have to wonder about the impact these individuals have on children today. It sometimes makes me wonder what I will do to keep my own children from being influenced by those a-listers that don't necessarily set the best example. For example, I hate the Los Angeles Lakers, but it is not this extreme dislike that causes my intense hatred for Kobe Bryant. His arrogant style and poor sportsmanship are just two of the characteristics to think of him as someone I'd rather never watch play basketball again. Also, what the hell is going on with Lindsay Lohan? What happened to that sweet little peanut from the remake of the Parent Trap? It's truly sad to see the way fame has changed from a little ginger bean to a dark haired crack whore. I am also choosing to group Miley Cyrus with her. Call me crazy, but Miss Hannah Montana seems to be turning into quite the little skeeze and definitely not someone I'd want my little girls listening to or aspiring to be. The stars that steal the limelight in today's world seriously concern me and it seems as if fame is becoming more toxic everyday. Perhaps the largest disappointment is the way these so-called stars are not limited by their adult caregivers that society dares us to call "parents". Michael Lohan, Billy Ray Cyrus, and whoever the hell Jessica's Simpson's dad is JUST NEED TO STOP. They feed off their children rather than putting a stop to their destructive ways, something that makes me wonder how some individuals are ever permitted to reproduce. I long for the day when the world will once again be filled with inspirational figures rather than underage criminals/drug addicts as role models. I only hope we don't have to go through a complete and utter hell before this happens.
xoxo.
Morgan

we'll always be best friends, whether you like it or not.

The other day I was sitting at work and these two girls came in. I could tell they were having a girl's day and they were definitely what we could call BFF. It really got me to thinking. I have never been a huge socialite. I prefer sticking close to a few people and developing a strong relationship with them rather than "spreading the love" among a few hundred friends. I really don't have a best friend. The best part of this is that I'm totally okay with that. I feel like the several individuals that I do have in my life that could begin to qualify as a best friend are outside the criteria for what society would allow. In simple terms, best friends aren't supposed to be family members or significant others. Well guess what? SCREW YOU, SOCIETY. I'm breaking the rules. This blog is all about MY best friend and the reasons for which I list her under that title.

1. Eating breakfast for dinner isn't weird.
2. Driving two hours to sit in a decent movie theater and watch a good chick flick is totally worth it....every single time.
3. Age is just a number. You determine how old you are by how you feel.
4. Along with #3, you are NEVER too old to accomplish your dreams. (i.e. running marathons)
5. Parents prepare you to have confidence in your own decisions and know that whatever you decide, they will support you.
6. Shopping means you get a prize. If you keep grandpa in line at lunch, you get two.
7. You might find one great friend in this world and you might be about thirty years old before that happens.
8. You can like hip hop/rap music no matter how old you are.

Thanks for being my best friend, Mom. You're stuck with the job so I hope you enjoy it :]
xoxo. Morgan

Nuggets of My First 20 Years: Inspired by Chelsea Handler

Lately I have been absolutely consumed by two things: a need for sunshine and Chelsea Handler's latest masterpiece Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang. Not only is the funniest author I have come in contact with since Jen Lancaster, but she speaks the truth no matter how profane or hilarious it might be. She also has a show on late night E! called Chelsea Lately, which if you haven't seen, I would highly recommend it. On this show, Chelsea provides 30 minutes of crude, lude humor along with her panel of roundtable comedians and her faithful assistant, Chuy. This little ball of charisma just so happens to be a hispanic little person (see oxymoron) or in Chelsea's words "a sweet little nugget". In honor of Chuy's literary efforts and my 20th birthday which just so happens to be today, I have decided to create a list of 20 of some of the most interesting/funny/valuable "nuggets" of information I have gathered over the last two decades.

#20: Ricky Martin may or may not have been the last person to know he is gay.
#19: It is never a good idea to play beer pong with hard alcohol. There's a reason it's called beer pong.
#18: Dogs can eat anything from paper napkins to cans, but NOT shellfish.
#17: Telling some to "drive safe" is relatively pointless. I mean it's not like you are going to say "please drive excessively fast and use road rage as often as possible".
#16: No matter what they tell you, never let your older sisters cut your hair.
#15: As time goes on, it seems like corporations are cutting more and more corners. For example, McDonalds' Happy Meal toys used to be gender specific. No more.
#14: Whoever invented the Furby was seriously disturbed.
#13: Dumb is not entertaining (see The Amazing Race 15).
#12: People who think Twilight is outstanding literature need to be slapped.
#11: Don't take life too seriously. Nobody makes it out alive.
#10: If you can't keep a pet alive, please do not reproduce. If you can't keep a plant alive, we have bigger problems.
#9: Cereal should be a food group. You can thank my mother for this.
#8: If you have enough time to learn how to play Halo or World of Warcraft, you need to get a job, a significant other, or both.
#7: Beauty magazines will usually make you feel like there is something wrong with your appearance.
#6: College is not a place for drama, slacking, or your small children.
#5: A religion should fit you. You don't have to fit that religion.
#4: Metal does not belong in the microwave. Just trust me here.
#3: If you don't shit, you die. Thanks for the advice, Daddy-O.
#2: Ames makes the best shovels.
#1: I'm 20? I used to think I'd be dead by now.

xoxo.
Morgan

my life in a shoebox.

so far this week has been fairly easy going. it's spring break starting tomorrow [thank the lord almighty] and even though i'm not going anywhere, a few days off school always finds a welcome place in my thoughts. fred also found out that he will be getting his job back with orem city at the beginning of april. he is so excited. i never knew someone could get so thrilled to throw asphalt, but he sure is. other than that, the weekly recap is pretty simple:

t.v. - loving survivor: heroes vs. villians and chopped [on the food network]
weather - awesome today :] hope it stays warm
apartment - very clean actually. i love when fred cleans :]
luck - i found eleven dollars outside the education building yesterday. ka-ching!
my car - clean on the outside and filthy on the inside. i have a moral obligation against cleaning/vacuuming it in the freezing weather.
on my ipod - swollen members, the john butler trio, priscilla ahn, and death cab for cutie
my blog - new layout. same me.
excitement - can't wait to see my mother dear on friday. love spending time with her. love catching chick flicks with her. love....her.
to do list - fill out my scholarship application for next year and do my math homework. yuck.
hmmm? - hoping i did well on my math test.

here's to warm weather over the next few days. i am so excited for a pretty relaxed week and weekend. be happy & believe in peace ♥

xoxo.
morgan.